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Achieved | Achievement | % of players | Unlock date |
|---|---|---|---|
 | During The War... Run over an opponent’s fallen body, adding insult to an already pretty painful injury. You monster. | 89.51% | 04/10/2019, 8:16:36 PM |
 | GrimAced Win your first race, proving that old people everywhere actually can drive at a moderate pace. | 61.5% | 04/10/2019, 8:40:21 PM |
 | My Kart Is Augmented Buy an upgrade. Good thing you old types like a bit of DIY, eh? | 59.6% | 04/10/2019, 8:35:36 PM |
 | Batteries not Included Get taken out by a UFO laser, more than a close encounter. | 39.38% | 04/11/2019, 10:47:58 PM |
 | We Can Rebuild Him Fully upgrade a single kart aspect, putting the younger generation and their custom cars to shame with your far superior experience in craftsmanship. And less body kits. | 31.8% | 04/11/2019, 10:44:16 PM |
 | Gone In Many Seconds Boost without hurtling far off course and crashing too horribly into the scenery 20 times. | 30.75% | 04/12/2019, 12:13:42 AM |
 | Feeling Lucky? Hose 20 oldies with the Uzi. The world’s slowest police chase is going to star you, you criminal. | 26.54% | 04/11/2019, 10:50:19 PM |
 | Am I Missing An Eyebrow? Expertly explode 20 pensioners with the use of a rocket, causing mass havoc and outcry from the Royal Aeronautical Society. | 25.27% | 04/12/2019, 12:07:05 AM |
 | Technophobic Use an EMP 20 times successfully - who says old people can’t use technology? You do, apparently. | 24.64% | 04/11/2019, 11:01:53 PM |
 | Silver Surfer Take your online points total past 10, proving that old people and the Internet isn’t a disaster waiting to happen. | 24.43% | |
 | Casting your net Win a single network multiplayer race, your first step to world domination. | 19.59% | |
 | Death Defier Get gold in all races in the village, telling Grim he’s not having your soul tonight. | 19.17% | |
 | Luckily My Shield Will Protect Me Successfully use a shield to block 20 horrible whippersnapper’s attacks against your innocent old self. | 18.96% | |
 | Slick Moves Like Jagger Slip up 20 people’s Sunday drive with some oil, making you no better than the young’ins who litter, you hypocrite. | 15.8% | 04/12/2019, 12:16:13 AM |
 | Worldly Wise Whiz Amass over 50 points online, it’s what Tim Berners-Lee would have wanted. | 13.06% | |
 | Death Derider Get gold in all races in the town, insulting Grim’s efficiency by evading his grasp twice now. | 12.64% | 04/11/2019, 10:43:12 PM |
 | Death Decider Get gold in all races in the showdown, winning your fate and telling Grim to stop harassing old people all over the world. | 11.37% | 04/12/2019, 1:58:32 AM |
 | Death Despiser Get gold in all races in the farm, making Grim REALLY want your soul now. | 9.48% | 04/11/2019, 11:15:53 PM |
 | Sweep Get 1 Crazy Granddad item. You are cleaning up this town. Somebody has to. You’re just doing it really slowly. | 9.27% | |
 | Million Dollar Granddad Fully upgrade your kart, showing your grandkids the money they could have had if they were nicer. | 8.42% | |
 | Death Defiler Get gold in all races in the graveyard, ruining Grim’s happy place. | 8% | 04/12/2019, 12:37:22 AM |
 | Disco Driving Catch that Saturday Night Fever by winning a network race on a Saturday. | 7.58% | |
 | No rest for the wicked Why rest when you could be earning achievements. Win a network race on a Sunday. | 7.37% | |
 | A Manic Monday Add to the mayhem by winning a network race on a Monday. | 6.74% | |
 | Jason goes to Sunny Pines Win a network race on a Friday. Just avoid going down by the lake if you can. | 6.74% | |
 | Tuesday’s child Put your graceful driving to good use by winning a network race on a Tuesday. | 6.74% | |
 | Over the hump Win a network race on a Wednesday. Then celebrate by visiting the most duck filled pond you ever sat by. | 6.53% | |
 | Double, double toil and trouble Get a Snatch Item pair for double points and bragging rights down at the bingo club. | 6.32% | |
 | A Quiet Night In Get the blow-up doll in the crazy Granddad game mode for an evening of pleasure with your very own plastic friend. | 6.32% | |
 | Snatch me if you can Snatch an item off an opponent in Snatch game mode. What has society come to! | 6.11% | |
 | Thor's Day Impress the mighty Thor with a network race victory on a Thursday. | 6.11% | |
 | Paperboy The Hard Way Run over 5 bikers. We know that drivers hate them, but you’re in mobility scooters! That’s just nasty. | 6.11% | |
 | He Was A Skater Boy Keyword being was. Knock 5 skaters off the road. | 4.84% | |
 | Trick or Treat Add insult to injury by winning a network race on Halloween, Grim’s favourite day of the year. | 4.21% | |
 | Christmas Truce? Not a chance, take out your opponents and win a network race on Christmas day. | 4.21% | |
 | Week Minded You're an all rounder. Win a network race on each day of the week.. | 4% | |
 | You Old Romantic Win a network race on Valentine’s Day and dedicate this achievement to that special someone. | 4% |